a year older every 15th October

If you can make a girl laugh - you can make her do anything.
- Marilyn Monroe

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Blogs are where one let out their own thoughts and feelings that may seem to be very disturbing to one’s mind. So here’s mine. I’m being honest as I can because I seriously can’t take it anymore.

It may mean nothing to most of you because you won’t know what I’m going through. The pressure and the insults that I receive everyday was (as hard as I want to say this, I’ll have to) HURTFUL!

Fat is a very sensitive and a (err,) hurtful remark. I think it’s the last remark I would ever want to receive in life. Serious. I’m sensitive to the word Fat. Dammit. I know I might be laughing together with you guys about this fat thingy. Laughing with heart aches. Is that considered laughing? Fine if you think it is. There isn’t a need for you to keep on saying it for almost every single day, every minute and every time you look at me. Just imagine if you were in my shoes. Try putting yourself in my place. It doesn’t matter if you said those words to make a joke out of it. But those kinds of joke are not JOKE for goodness sake.

Me: Okay don’t talk about fats already. They’ll sure to get back to me one.
And yea, 5 minutes later. I’m right. They asked. I think the word fat seems very popular in my class. I don’t know why. For god sake, enough ah eh. ENOUGH! :(
Will there be a day where no 'fat' is being mentioned?

And for now, please don’t ask me why.
Don’t ask me why I’m tall. I’m tired of answering.
Don’t ask me why I’m fat. I’m tired of “laughing” too.
Don’t ask me why I’m big.
And now, I'm on a diet. A very self-conscious person I am.

I can’t get mad. I can’t get angry, what’s more scold. So the only way would be this. I’m being too nice and I'm a very soft-hearted person. Please eh.

There’s another thing I want to talk about here. But I find it too sensitive. Only Iqah knows what I wanted to say.

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