a year older every 15th October
If you can make a girl laugh - you can make her do anything.
- Marilyn Monroe
|AIDIL| AIN| ALIA| ASH| ATIQAH| CHARLIE| DORIS EFF| EMILY| FADILAH| FARHAH| FIZA| FUSS| FYDA DARLING| HUDA ELMO| JACLYN| LAA`LAA| LILY MAHIRAH| MAIRA| MARSHA BUBBLE| MURNIE| MYZA| NORAKIN| PRISCILLA| RAFIE| SIRVIN| TING TING| ZAIMAH| ZEE| ZIZAH|
Just when I thought that things would perfectly fine, once again, I’m wrong. Since blogging is a very cheap therapy, I’ll just try my best to shoot whatever I wanna say here without anyone complaining and me, having the satisfaction. Well, okay maybe not really, but still, I’ll feel like as though I’ve let go part of the stuffs that has been bugging me inside.
As much as I hate 2007, it’s still better than 2008. No matter how mean or how bad that year has been, I’m sure that now, it’s worse. I’m going through the part where I feel that all those things that has ever brought me up to the sky, came crashing down at one go. I blame myself for everything that’s happening because I think that it is partly my fault. As cliché as it may sound, it takes two hands to clap. So if I don’t really take note of everything that’s happening, then I guess, shits like this won’t really be happening. And because of that, things have been really hard on me. People around are still asking and questioning me about everything. Sometimes, I wonder, do they really care and wanting to lend a listening ear or they are just plain kaypoh who wants to interfere in other people life. I thought that once everything is done and over with, it’s settled. I have my say, and you have yours. But then again, I’m so very wrong. I swear I’ve never been this pressurize before nor have I felt this bad. This is the worse feeling that one can ever ask for. I might have the normal ‘hahaha’ or ‘heheheh’ going around but you just won’t know what lies behind the screen. I just hate telling everyone about how I feel. But wait, does this considered as telling? For those who really know me, they should know what I mean.
For now, from what I observe, there are 2 different types of friends. Those who really care and those who just wanted to know about your life or in other words; busybodies. Well, it’s lucky for me because I think I know who belongs to which category. Yes. I used the word, I think. I may not even sure whether my assumption is right. The people that I trust are nowhere to be found. And it’s surprisingly enough when those whom you don’t really talk to or rather those whom you communicate once a week or once a month by just saying a pathetic “hello” and “goodbyes” were there telling you, ‘Hey, you don’t sound okay. I’ll be here when you need me. Just nudge me or ring me up.’ Surprising aye. No one knows what they’re thinking and what do they really want from you. I mean, I do appreciate the care and concern that’s coming out from you guys but yeah I’m just too paranoid because I’m afraid that those mistakes will repeat by itself. I’ve seen enough of the true world out there and now, I need to go. I really do. Nothing feels right at this point of time.
When will this game end?
On a BRIGHTER note,
HAPPY 17TH ZEEEEEEEEE ! :)
have fun on your birthday alright !
<33
Labels: when nothing seems right